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The correct way to use your knife. (What you were not told)

I am quite suprised at the number of knife enthusiasts who did not know how to properly utilize their cutting implements.. Myself included.

For me, the realization came late. Middle age is a period where your body undergoes considerable change, and not necessarily for the better. I have perhaps one hundred knives in my possession. Maybe 150. I don't know for sure, unless I count them. But that is not important here. What's important is the realisation that I have been abusing most of my knives. By "abuse", I do not mean using a knife for tasks it was not designed for(e.g. as a pry-bar, can opener, batoning, clever, hammer etc) and then putting it away wet. By abuse, I meant reading up on a knife, looking up reviews of it on the internet forums, watching trials and abuse test of it on youtube, etc., and then after procuring it, unboxing it, fondling it and put it away in a drawer or safe, not to be seen again. Personally, I have this incoherent fear that if I were to start using that knife, and consequently having to sharpen it, I would take away some magic from it. In short, I would cause it to depreciate drastically in value:

You walked into a pawn shop: "so how much is it worth?"

Dealer: "hmm..this is a sprint run, and only 50 were ever made in this shade of orange.."

You: "..wow.."

Dealer: " and it costs $286 back in 2016..in today's market, it would fetch at least $1800 to $2,300 at an auction.."

You: " oh wow !! "

Dealer: " but because you have cleaned your knife with steel wool, it's worth about $15 to $20 now.."


For the most part, the magic is real. Everytime I looked at my "tactical folder" collection, I imagine if I were to have any one of the folders in my pocket (right side, tip-up config, mind you), and if confronted by four bad guys in a dimly lit alley, I most probably could deploy the knife in the dark and open the bad guys' bellies in one single, quick, smooth Emerson swipe. (And if there were eight bad guys, it would take two swipes, max. Provided it's tip-up, right side config)

So what is the proper way to use a knife? Simple: USE IT. Before you call me lame, I do buy affordable knives that I especially like in pairs. One for use, the other for "abuse" in the knife crypt. But we all know this is not a very practical approach both in terms of space and financial constraints. At least for most people.

I have found that the best way to start using your knives (or anything for that matter) is to sit down on a quiet evening and write your own obituary and also a post-funeral ebay listing for your knife collection. It should contain something like this:

" ..Xavior Emeritus Lee, collector and proud owner of a large collection of pocket knives, daggers, bowies, hunters, machetes, swords, axes, all of them in pristine or unused condition....I do not know much abot knives.... my loss is your gain.."


I might be wrong. There are people who believe "he who dies with the most knives wins".

But then again, this post is about using, not winning.


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